Thank you for your comments!

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This blog is my personal diary of my relationship with a narcissist. I hope my experiences help others who are dealing with similar issues in their relationship, related to narcissistic spouse, physical and emotional cheating, mistrust, insecurity, infidelity and emotional abuse. I will write to this blog on regular basis. Please feel free to comment on any of my writings, I would greatly appreciate all feedback.
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Thank you so much for your comments! I really appreciate them. I know how this situation must seem to outside, when you only get to listen to sad stuff I am writing here... The truth is that sometimes there are good times, sometimes there are bad times. But of course there should not be bad times like this in relationship. As I have said, I am in no position to make diagnosis of anyone, since I am not MD, but based on everything I have read about narcissism, I feel this man really fits to the picture very well.

Someone commented here earlier, that if a narcissist is being abandoned by everyone, then he has zero changes to get better, ever.... only with support of someone close to him he has a change to improve. But in many cases narcissist will not improve, no matter what (even tho in some cases improvement is possible). I feel that I have been trying so long, that I can now say that with this man there is no chances for significant improvement... I guess I have somehow hoped that things could again be as they were in beginning.. but the truth is that so much negative stuff has happened during last year, that I feel I cannot take it, not for the rest of my life.

Yes, you are right, perhaps the best solution would be just do decision fast, and not to try to slowly get over my feeling towards narcissist first... I have just tried to avoid that heartache, which I know will follow when I break up with narcissist. But perhaps that is the right decision, to accept that there will be heartache, and deal with it, ant then go on with my life. Writing to this blog and getting your comments has given me more strength. Thank you for your words, I am not offended at all by anything you say, I know this is not healthy situation for me and I feel its good that someone is saying these things to me directly, that "shakes me up" a bit.. :)

So, I will now start to seriously plan my leaving in practice. How to do things in right way. I must try to remind me that its not really narcissist who I am missing, but I am missing my own illusion of the way narcissist was in the beginning of this relationship. I think some wise person commented like this at some point in this blog. I think it is true. The reason why its so hard to leave is because I am so attached to my "good" memories... But i must try to take them as they are, mere memories, nothing more than that. I must learn to separate present and past. And I am not missing "present him", I am missing "past him". I wish I can hold on to this thought...

I am so happy every time you are commenting on my writings, it really gives me strength, thank you so very much!!! :)

If you wish to view all my posts simultaneously on one page please click on title "surviving infidelity and cheating in bad relationship" at the top of this page. This way the latest post will be displayed on top of the page and oldest at the bottom.
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